Sunday, January 16, 2022

What have Manchester United got that Watford haven’t?

I need help. I need help very, very badly. I am a forty-six year old man who has been a Watford supporter all my life. You may think that is enough for me to ask for help but my problem is actually significantly more serious than that.

I have done everything I can and I have run out of ideas. I have lived a reasonably good life. I give money to children in need every year and I help old ladies across the road. The issue I am writing about is so serious that I can only assume I did something terrible in a previous life. It is now time to ask the readers of Soccer News to offer me some advice.

I live in the South of England now, near the south coast, and the closest football league team to where I live with my family is Southampton. My eldest son, aged twenty-one, is a Southampton fan. I would prefer him to support Watford but I fully understand and agree with his decision to support his local club. We have lived near Southampton for nearly all of his life and he is doing the right thing.

As a Southampton fan he can hardly be accused of being a glory hunter and he is experiencing all the gloom, doom, frustration, upset and anger that I have enjoyed supporting Watford. It is a character building exercise, supporting a bad team.

My middle son, aged nineteen, is a Watford fan. It is terribly wrong for parents to have favourites amongst their children but when this sort of thing happens it is very difficult not to. I can’t tell you how proud I am that I managed to convert him at a young age and that he has remained loyal to the boys from Vicarage Road. He is the one person in my family who shows the appropriate amount of respect to me as the patriarch. In the old days, the kids would have been made to agree with me, but now they are able to make their own choices. Whether it was my promise to leave all our worldly goods to him alone, and not his brothers, if he supported the Hornets I don’t know, but he wears his yellow shirt with pride.

Then, if I can bring myself to say it, we come to my problem. This is not a small problem; this is a very big, king sized problem. My youngest son who is fourteen is a truly wonderful boy in everything else he does. He is polite, kind and helpful. He shows no sign of any evil tendencies or mental illness. He does well at school and he is a decent footballer. He has lived all his life on the south coast and has no connection whatsoever with the North of England. He seems to love his mum and me, but there is one inexplicable aspect to his personality. Something has happened that I never thought possible in my household and never believed would happen to me. He supports…Manchester United!

How did it happen? Don’t you think I have asked myself that question millions of times as I lie awake at night unable to sleep because the dreadful shame. However much I think about it I just don’t know how it happened. I blame myself, of course, but I’m not sure what else I could have done. In desperation, I have asked him, “What have Manchester United got that Watford haven’t?”

OK, I knew it was a stupid question as soon as I had asked it!

The fact is, of course, that my youngest son has been interested in football for about ten years. During that time, Manchester United have won six Premier League titles, two FA Cups, one League Cup, two Champions League’s, two Community Shields and one Word Club championship. That’s fourteen titles in my son’s short football watching life. He is certainly not alone in being a Manchester United fan amongst his age group.

In an attempt to rescue the situation I have thrown Watford’s two play-off win promotions to the Premier League and the League Cup semi-final and FA Cup semi-final achieved in that same period of time at him but he remains distinctly under whelmed by my beloved club. He has this sort of smirk on his face when he points out that we lost both semi-finals and got relegated out of the Premier League straight away both times. Children can be cruel.

So I am left with a terrible dilemma. Do I continue trying to convert him to the Glory Hornets or do I give up and start telling people that I only have two sons?

It would be a shame to lose him but there is only so much a dad can take. I need help. What can I do?

Ps. Before anyone accuses me of being a terrible parent, I should point out that I am joking…I think!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Graham Fisher


SHARE OR COMMENT ON THIS ARTICLE

WE RECOMMEND

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
24 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
kevin
kevin
13 years ago

ur a terrible parent

A. Thomsen
13 years ago

What MU has that Watford dont? Well, you answered that pretty much yourself:

“Manchester United have won six Premier League titles, two FA Cups, one League Cup, two Champions League’s, two Community Shields and one Word Club championship” – and everything that follows those titles.

Why is it a shame, to support a better team than Watford? You need to get over your egosim.

baka
baka
13 years ago

What? Terrible joke -_-

Dan
Dan
13 years ago

Just point out he is a football FAN and not a football SUPPORTER – that’s usually enough to rile any Man Yoo ‘fan’ who’s never even been to Old Trafford, much less have any kind of connection with the region.

Dan Wood
13 years ago

I think that to be a true football fan you either have to have lived locally and supported the club as your local team or have moved to the area and then got into football and adopted the local team. I too am a Watford fan and would have it no other way. Watching Man U or any of the other top teams means that your low point is not winning the league or getting knocked out of the Champions League at the quarter final stage, for a WFC fan it can be losing 3-0 at home to Barnsley on… Read more »

Smudger
Smudger
13 years ago

Let’s hope he doesn’t turn out to be gay as well! Only joking. As a fellow watford fan, I can only say he is missing out! No, really. To share in both Watford’s triumph and misery makes those good times even more sweet. Man U fans don’t understand losing, so cannot fully appreciate winning. Existing in a bubble where failure to win the champions league is ‘failure’ is not living. Supporting a team via watching sky, is no real experience. Try running onto the field after Man U win the champions league final to mob the players and stick a… Read more »

Bri
Bri
13 years ago

I call this bad parenting indeed – had you forced them to every Watford fixture and beaten them sufficiently when they were younger then this would not be an issue. Although aged just six at the time, I remember clearly my fathers wrath when a good natured (but scouse) uncle cheekily sent me an Everton shirt one christmas, garments weren’t flame-proof in those days so it didn’t survive long in the fire.

Be warned any young parents out there, it is your duty.

Kris
Kris
13 years ago

Well it’s simple really. You have two options.

1. Disown him. You have two other sons – that plenty.
2. Send him to China or Guantanamo in Cuba – they have methods of changing people’s minds for them.

Good luck – and up the ‘Orns.

Adrian
Adrian
13 years ago

As a Watford season ticket holder living in Poole I sympathise as like you I have no reason to connect my kids to Vicarage Road. My Son isn’t interested in footy, but my solution was to buy my daughter a season ticket. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Each time we go to the Vic I point out that she sits less than 100 yards from where she was born, and we often get to Watford early to take her through The Harlequin to buy something. However, and seriously this time round, my daughter is 17 and the best quality… Read more »

James
James
13 years ago

That’s a tough one and im sorry to hear that your youngest has fallen into the wrong crowd. Im afraid I think you might have left it too late to change his mind… this is something you really should have been doing at a much younger age. Why dont you compromise with him and settle for Watford to be his “second” team (cos all prem fans like to watch real football occassionally) THEN… take him to a game or two (“well im going and seeing as theyr’e your second team why dont you come along”) Follow this up with a… Read more »

Live Scores

advertisement

Betting Guide Advertisement

advertisement

Become a Writer
More More
Top
1
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x